A few years ago, during a particularly challenging period in my romantic life, I tried paint by number. It was therapeutic and helped me escape, in a strange I'm-here-but-not-here kinda way. At that time, I was still oblivious on the concept of flow and mindfulness though, so it felt like a breakthrough.
Fast forward to now, I am again doing another piece of paint by number, this time on a bigger canvas. The trigger this time were not romantic challenges, but my inability to relax and do nothing. These days if I'm not working, I consider it time wasted. It's not a bad problem to have but honestly quite alarming especially when it's already midnight and my brain just won't slow down.
This piece I'm working on is called Van Gogh's Tree, obviously not the master's original work but the colour scheme bears a resemblance to Starry Night, all midnight blue and fiery orange. I love it so much!
It was hard to get into the rhythm at first as the piece is quite intricate and requires patience, urgh so many small patterns. The first day, I can feel my frustration building every time I accidentally painted outside the lines, or when the paint just won't glide smoothly. After an hour, I stopped to turn in for the night. Before closing the office door, I took a last look at the canvas and notice how good it actually is, from far. Lightbulb moment! My critical, OCD self was fussing over every minute detail when I was so close up and focused on the canvas but when I take in the big picture, I've actually done an amazing job and the piece is looking good already.
So the canvas is like life, yes? The everyday grind can be hard and we might not do a perfect job every time, but if we try to give the best we can anyway, the big picture will turn out to be great. Regardless of finger smudges and paint blotches.
Man, I feel so philosophical, so original y'all. Here's a picture of my beautiful mess.
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